Jump to content


  • Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won


burp last won the day on March 17

burp had the most liked content!

About burp

  • Rank
    Whoop Whoop

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Not Telling
  1. Reviews

    The other day I decided to splash out and buy some Andrex Shea Butter toilet rolls so I thought I'd review them for you guys. Andrex have been at the top of their game for years. The secret to their success is quite simple, use a really cute puppy in advertising and packaging, normally bouncing along trailing a length of toilet paper out of its gob for added cuteness. It's a plan that was pretty much fail proof as research has shown that the only people who don't like cute puppies are serial killers and dentists. Andrex have evolved their line of toilet papers over the years to add "features" that make them more and more luxurious. These days you can find toilet paper that is quilted, scented and softened. It's pretty much the equivalent of wiping your bum with a fluffy cloud. And who doesn't want that? History lesson over, I've been using my packet of Andrex Shea Butter toilet rolls for a couple of weeks now. Shea butter is commonly used in cosmetics as a moisturiser or lotion. The toilet paper is also enriched with vitamin E, which can't be a bad thing, although I'm not aware of any particular benefits gained from applying this directly to your anus. I spoke to a respected nutritionist who confirmed that "while vitamin E should be taken in as many forms as possible, wiping your ass is not a viable alternative to eating peanuts." So how is it in use? Deliberately avoiding any messy and graphic descriptions, it does a decent job at what it's supposed to do. It's very soft yet tough and not too thick, unlike some of the quilted papers available. I'll probably go back to the standard Andrex rolls I've always used with the pictures of puppies on them. I think I've got used to them and anything else feels weird. The packaging for these Shea Butter enriched toilet rolls also contains "instructions" for people trying out toilet paper for the first time. Recently adopted feral kids who were raised by bears, for example. They recommend 3-4 sheets per wipe, I'd say 1 or 2 is adequate unless you're mopping up the remains of last night's curry. Oh and wipe from front to back they say, because wiping the used side of toilet paper towards your genitals is bad. Then wash your hands before you stick them in your mouth (or anyone else's). All good advice. In closing, they're OK. The benefits of shea butter and vitamin E in a toilet roll I'm unsure about, but they're worth a go if you fancy trying some luxury toilet paper. I imagine Supernovi will pop by soon to say that he needs to wipe his ass at least 200 times per second or it's unwipeable, so these wouldn't be any good for him. Come on people, review stuff...
  2. What doesn't piss you off?

    Rental place review please
  3. Reviews

  4. Reviews

    I understood it after the first video, I’m not sure why you both think otherwise. I even said I’m not saying it’s impossible for it to feel smoother at 100FPS. If having read that article you now believe that something which can have an effect which amounts to milliseconds of difference to input lag, makes the game unplayable, I’m not sure what to say. I assume you were playing an unplayable game for about 100 hours while you had V-Sync on. Bizarre.
  5. Don’t tell me about these things, I’ll be googling rumble gaming chairs before the days out!
  6. Reviews

    I didn’t ignore it, I watched it. How am I wrong? Your screen displays 60FPS and that’s all I said. This is ridiculous, your having this argument while playing on a 60hz screen. I guarantee getting a screen with a higher refresh rate will improve performance WAY more than playing at 200FPS in yours. And I guarantee once you’ve done that, you’ll be on here saying “how anyone can play this game on a 60hz screen I’ll never know”. The fact that your linking to all these things to back up your claims simply leads me back to what I keep saying. You’ve convinced yourself this problem is 100 tines worse than it is. If you’d said I prefer playing at 90 FPS as it feels a little smoother I wouldn’t have even responded. It’s your statement that anything less is unplayable that’s silly. If I told you I drive a 2 litre car which does 0-60 in 8 seconds and when I drive a 1 litre car that does it in 14 seconds it’s a noticeable difference you’d say fair enough. If I told you any car less than 2 litres is undriveable you’d tell me it was all in my head. And you’d be right.
  7. Reviews

    It’s an argument I have no interest in getting into, but if you have a 60hz monitor then you’re not getting any more than 60FPS. Fact. If you say you can tell the difference in terms of input lag I think it’s because you’re spending way to much time worrying about such things instead of just playing games and having fun. Saying anything below 90FPS is unplayable on a 60hz monitor is just daft as your monitor can only display 60FPS. I’m not saying it’s impossible for it to feel smoother at 100FPS due to reduced lag, but I still believe 90% of your concerns are in your head.
  8. anybody else feel that earthquake? My computer chair shook from side to side, I thought the building was about to collapse, scared the shit out of me
  9. Reviews

    I'm playing at 40-45 average and it's fine for me, I regularly finish in the top 10, finished 2nd twice in 3 games earlier this week so can't be running like a piece of shit, unless I'm a gaming god, which I'm not. Never noticed any input lag. Can't play with less than 90 FPS? Sounds like you've read too many articles and it's all in your head. Not sure who you're talking to re the V-Sync thing as nobody has said that. The monitor has GSync and 100hz refreseh rate, if you can tell the difference between 100 and 144 you won't like it, can't imagine most people will have an issue. Nobody was playing games on a 144Hz monitor 6 years ago and I don't remember everyone saying all games were terrible then. Maybe I'm just not sensitive to such things. The immersion of the wider screen is far more important to me than 90FPS and a higher refresh rate. Each to their own.
  10. Reviews

    What did you get? I can highly recommend the keyboard I got if you're not put off by the cost. I actually set my keyboard up to play PUBG yesterday so I have the main keys in green, red for the meds/pills and blue for weapons, all other keys turned off, it's so good for jumping straight to the right keys without having to remember them. Plus you can assign different key settings to individual programs so it automatically goes to my PUBG set up when I launch the game and then reverts back when I quit out. Really impressed. The best thing was setting a macro key up with "F - Ctrl 1". Now I can approach any vehicle from any side and hit the macro key and you enter the vehicle and then immediately jump to the driver seat. At worst it saves running round to the right side every time and at best can save you if running to your car under fire. It does, I mentioned that, but it's OK, it's not losing that much top and bottom. Would be better if it had proper support but anything you notice will be forgotten once you're playing.
  11. Reviews

    I'd say buying a house was more exciting than getting a new keyboard. Well exciting once you're though the stress of buying and then moving. A review of a house would be awesome though . Cheers. I'm still at the enjoying sitting down at my computer stage, hopefully that lasts. BUT, they're just about to release some new speakers that match all my stuff with the lights and everything and they look great. Goddammit. Razer have me by the balls like some kinda mug. BTW that wrist rest in the picture that comes with the keyboard is like a padded strip of comfort. You could sleep on it, if you were small enough. It doesn't flow from the keyboard properly though, kinda makes you wrists up higher than they should be, plus it covers the light up logo on the keyboard. I've left it in the box for now but it's by far the comfiest wrist rest you'll ever find.
  12. Reviews

    Let's try and wake this place up a bit. We used to have a review section years ago and I've just sold off a few of my Hot Toys figures for a tidy profit which I've blown on ridiculously expensive PC stuff. I'm not bothering with huge detail as there are plenty of reviews for all this stuff, just my thoughts on the upgrades really. If you have anything else you'd like to know, just ask. Oh, and review your own stuff. So the people who come here every day have summut to read Razer Blackwidow Chroma V2 - £125 Crazy money for a keyboard, first mechanical keyboard I've had and, noise aside, it's a joy to use. My old keyboard I've had for years and the letters were getting hard to see so this is a long overdue upgrade. You know it's well built as it weighs a fucking ton compared to the lightweight plastic of my old one. Tried it out in PC World and loved the clackyness of the mechanical keys, can't really explain why it's better, just is. That's for typing. Gaming is a bit more annoying as if you're playing a shooter and bouncing around between the WASD keys it's not quite as nice, but small sacrifice. Other than that it's got all the pretty colours going on which I have just cycling through colours. Thought it would get annoying but don't even notice it unless you're sat back not typing. You can also light up keys independently in any colour so you can set up your fav games with only the keys you use lit. Red for health stuff, blue for weapons etc, pretty cool. There are also 5 macro keys. I like pretty lights, so I like it. Not sure it's a keyboard to use next to your Mrs while she's watching Eastenders though, due to the noise. Luckily I can't attract women so it doesn't matter. Razer Deathadder Elite Mouse - £60 I loved my old mouse and there was little wrong with it, the Logitech G5, I'd had for years. This mouse though went with the keyboard, had the same fancy lights and you can sync them to run through colours together. So obvs I had to get it. Pretty much the same as my old one in terms of features, couple of buttons on top to change the mouse speed (up to 5) and two on the side for lobbing grenades and the like. Did I mention the pretty lights? Corsair MM200 Mouse Mat - £30 Calling this a mouse mat is an understatement, it's 3 feet long so it's a mouse and keyboard mat. My old one had a picture of Darth Maul on it, I got it when Ep1 came out 19 years ago! Needless to say, this one is better. I like having such a large space to roll the (new) mouse about on and it feels a hundred times better and smoother than my tatty old one. Obviously. Not really much else to say, I like it. Razer Kraken 7.1 V2 - £100 Notice a theme here? I've got an old Speedlink Medusa headset that is quite heavy and tiring to wear for a long time. Tried this on in the shop and it was like sticking a cloud on your head (probably). The leather headset blocks noise out as soon as you put it on and kinda sucks to your ears in a good way. Way more comfy than my old one for extended wearing and also doesn't dig glasses into my head when I don't have the contacts in, unlike the old one. Sound is impressive, the 7.1 seems to work well and my mate says I'm clearer now so I guess the mic's a good un also. And it has pretty lights, that sinc up with my keyboard and mouse. Who doesn't want that? OK, I can't see them when I'm wearing it but i know they're there, looking cool. Ear cups are leather instead of material on my old ones and they do get a bit hot, might get sweaty in the summer? So this is where I stopped, but then I fancied getting a new monitor to complete the spending. I've got an old 23" something or another of no particular significance and thought about getting another for dual monitor goodness, maybe but two so they match. Then I started looking at Ultrawide's. Oops. AOC AG352UCG Quad HD 35" Curved Monitor - £730 Big. It's very big. I've had to re-arrange my office a bit to put something behind my desk so I can push it back a bit. My main worry was how my GTX970 was going to cope pushing 3440x1440 pixels around when it was used to 1080P. Much better than I thought is the answer. COD WW2 on mainly top settings is getting around 40/45 FPS depending on the map. BF1 on ultra gets around the same, a bit less. PUBG on high is around 35 FPS. Now while those aren't very impressive figures to be gaming on, I was concerned I'd be putting everything on low to play games so knowing I can drop to medium settings and be fine was a relief as I don't want to upgrade my PC at the moment, especially with the Bitcoin douchebags putting the cost of graphic cards through the roof. Gaming is awesome in ultrawide. PUBG takes a bit of vertical height to give you the horizontal but it's fine. The other two games mentioned have proper support. Head-bob in COD is a bit more distracting as it seems amplified by the wider screen, need to check if I can turn it off. Film trailers in proper widescreen are awesome, no black bars! And you can easily have 3 documents up at once for multi tasking (watching 3 types of porn at once). Took a few days to get used to the size but it's already the norm now after a couple of weeks. Thumbs up for the ultrawide experience from me. None of this was planned, I just tried the keyboard and decide to get it as I had the collectibles money. And the mouse went well with it. And the headphones. And the mousemat. And then my monitor looked old next to all the new stuff. I've stopped now.
  13. You staying in Finzels Reach? Very posh.